I asked my future son-in-law seven questions before giving my blessing to marry my daughter.
These seven questions are not original. While searching for questions to ask, I came across Deborah J. Thompson’s article, “5 Questions to Ask Your Future Son-in-Law”. During an interview with well-known as the star football player John Croyle, Thompson wrote about John’s five questions he asked his then future son-in-law. I added two questions that are important to me.
These questions are instructive. Answering them correctly, will benefit a young man in gaining a blessing from a woman’s father. And just as important, they will help to ground the marriage in the proper foundation needed for a lifetime of marital bliss.
- Are you the man God has chosen for my daughter? What God puts together, let man put asunder. It is helpful when going through tough times in marriage to remember that this union is God’s plan. God invented marriage. He chooses our mate. And He is the foundation needed to make it successful. If we begin to have second thoughts, we will answer to God. And remember, He does not make mistakes.
- Can I trust you to love her, protect her, and care for her? Friendly accountability help us keep our promises. I am being asked to hand over my daughter to be cared for by another man. I took care of her all her life. Can I trust this man to take care of my daughter as well if not better than I have done? Can this man tell me that I can trust him?
- Will you take care of her financially? My daughter was comforted with food, a house, and clothes. Does this man intend to continue taking care of her?
- Will you take care of her emotionally? My daughter is a woman. She is emotional, and she feels her way through life. God made her that way. When a man marries a woman, he is united to an emotion counterpart. Her feelings are real and important to her well-being. Her feelings need to be respected and nurtured. Can this man live wisely with the emotions of my daughter?
- Will you take care of her mentally? My daughter is smart and successful. Everyday, I thought of ways to help her to be better and smarter. Will this man continue to help her be a smarter person?
- Will you take care of her physically? My daughter knows that I will protect her. The question has already been answered. She feels safe when I am around. Will this man give her the same unquestionable sense of safety and protection?
- Will you take care of her spiritually? Except the LORD build the house, they labour in vain that build it (Psalm 127:1). I taught my daughter the importance of doing right and growing spiritually in the Word of God, the Spirit of God, and the church of God. Will this man continue to provide the spiritual nurturing and leadership for her well-being?
These are sobering questions that every young man should be asked when he thinks he is ready to marry. The answers will prove to be helpful when times get tough in the marriage. God puts two together to stay together. It is up to them to fulfill His plan for their marriage.